Create a legacy with stories

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.      Deuteronomy 4-9

 Over thirty years ago, my grandmother and grandfather on mother’s side passed away. This wonderful couple worked hard during a transition era when gardening and farming supplied most of your family needs but an outside job was needed to provide money for clothes and incidentals.  I was privileged to have spent many weekends and summers at their home.  They lived on a dirt road that seemed forever to get to. As a matter of fact, one of the dirt roads sat so close to the house that if you stuck your hand out of the bedroom window, you would be able to touch the vehicle passing by.  I remember an early time, before my teens, when our visits were almost like camping today. The home did not have running water or indoor plumbing.  We hauled water that was drawn from the well, visited the outhouse when we had to go to the bathroom and I now personally know why a certain size galvanized tub is called a “wash tub”.  We took bathes in it on the screened in back porch in the summer time.  My grandmother, Nanny Edwards, grew all of their vegetables that they ate in a garden, had chickens running around in the yard for eggs, milked a family cow for milk, butter and cream and raised hogs for butcher each fall.  It took everyone living in the home, to keep things moving forward each day. My Papa Edwards, enjoyed watching wrestling on the small black and white television and drinking black coffee from the saucer not the cup.   

My children never had the opportunity to meet this couple in person. But they know who they are. My girls can recognize pictures of them and they have visited the home place and walked through the house. My family has eaten meals with my aunts and uncles and heard numerous stories about the “good times” that we had experiencing life on the farm.  As we traveled in the car, ate at the dinner table or took advantage of time together doing chores around our house, the stories were shared and the laughter was generated as they said “yuck” or “no you did not!” to many of the activities that would  not be acceptable or dreamed  of by today’s standard of living.  It was important that my girls have an understanding of their heritage. 

I know that all adults from my generation remember their grandparents talking about walking to school each day uphill both ways in the snow and mud each day. The weather was always raining or snowing, the conditions were always bad and we had it so good compared to our life style today. Well guess what… the names have been changed but the story line is almost the same.  It is the responsibility for each generation to share the family history with each new generation. The stories, names, accomplishments, jobs and travels of our family give roots and stability to our children. I know…. They will say that they don’t care or that they don’t have time. But, the information that you demonstrate as important to share will also become important for them to share.  Priorities are learned and developed, they are not innate.

As long as you keep your family members alive in your heart and head, their memory and legacy lives forever. I see my grandparents living through my girls as I see them make choices, push their boundaries and experiment with box gardens, crafts, home projects and sewing. I will say,” I see that you have inherited your Nanny Edwards’ love for cooking” or “You have the temper of your Papa, don’t let it get the best of you”.

When children know that they have deep family roots, they seem to have that confidence to withstand the storms that life is going to bring to them.  Your family history, the things that you have learned to do or help your parents do around the house.Even your stories from your childhood!. They may not seem old and important to you.. But they may be interesting to your children.
When you spend time with children, sharing your talents and your tales your children seem to grow and become confident and understanding.