Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is
old, he will not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:6
As we bring our traditional school year to a close… I hear
the teachers begin singing, “It the most wonderful time of the year”, as they
begin the end of year procedures.
This
time of year brings one phase of our life to an end and another beginning. With
the school children, they are attending awards ceremonies, and graduation
ceremonies to mark this transition.
The awards ceremonies celebrate the achievements and excellence
of the student learning but also provide a positive, self esteem building
experience for the student as he or she move into the summer months ahead. The
awards ceremony allows the student to reflect upon their goal setting and their
ability to reach those goals during the 9 month period of time. As parents and teachers, encouraging children
to set and reach goals is an important aspect of critical thinking and working
students through this though process allows for mental development and
celebration for the achievement of learning these skills.
Attending the graduation ceremonies for the variety of ages
from kindergarten, middle school , high school and college marks the end of one
stage of our children’s’ lives and the step into another. In a society that
does not provide consistent rites of passage to celebrate the travel of
adulthood and all of its responsibilities, we use these graduation ceremonies
as a pacifier and stand in. Other than graduation ceremonies our children also
use, getting a drivers license, which is now 15 for permits and 16 for
independent, celebrating the 18th birthday that gives additional
freedom and finally 21 which is the mark of true adult freedoms.
Many cultures and religions provide assistance with this
celebration with customs, test or responsibilities. What can a parent do, to
prepare their children for adult life with in the home? Are there skills that
need to be learned that the schools or church cannot provide?
I say yes…..
The Circle of Moms website published a blog a few weeks ago
that identified 7 Life skills that need to be taught to our children. They are:
1 How to cook and plan and menu, 2. Laundry skills, 3. Time management, 4. Team
work, 5. Basic money management, 6.Good cleaning habits and 7.How to let go of perfection.
The schools have to focus on core curriculum and the churches are trying to
provide a safe learning environment for spiritual growth but what are we going
to do about the life skills in-between? This is where the family unit needs to
come into play. Rituals and routines at home can also transition children from
one stage of their life into another with gradually increasing the child’s
responsibilities at home, allowing the child to assist with house hold chores
and routines as well as an empowerment of accountability. If each family environment prepared their
children in the 7 skills identified on the Circle of Moms website, we would
have a better prepared, well rounded adult. This would provide a team effort
between the school, church and home to allow for success and the development of
a total person.
As a parent or grandparent making decisions concerning what
is important in your child’s life, ask yourself, what are you teaching directly
and indirectly depending on your expectations and requirements? Are you holding your child accountable for
what is important to build the BEST adult possible? When you celebrate the mile
stones in your child’s life of graduation, driving and birthdays , are you
gradually increasing your expectations and allowing for the child to grow in
all aspects physically, spiritually, psychologically ethically and
responsibility? We only meet the
expectations that are placed before us. Are you setting them high enough for
learning and low enough for achievement?
Are you preparing your children to be independent,
contributing adults to our community or are we allowing our children to depend
on us too long?